Often times a demon we parents of children with special needs face is the foreboding future. Our child’s whole life seems continually before us in a way that just isn’t the same with our children who are developing normally. We torment ourselves with the idea that what we do today will mean everything for him or her at age 25. And in some ways we are right. The continuity of treatment is vitally important. But lets give ourselves permission to take it one day at a time. We can get through today. And then through another today, and another. If that’s still too much, we can get through this hour, this dinner time, this doctor appointment. We can handle what is happening right now in the way we want to.
An article on the Eduguide website at http://www.eduguide.org/Parents-Library/Kids-Learning-Disabilities-ADHD-1123.aspx titled Advice for Dealing with Kid’s Learning Disabilities: ADHD by Betty Walter advises, “The diagnostic and treatment process take a lot of time. Steps in the process often can get confusing and out of order. Just when one problem is solved, a new one appears. Take one day at a time, and enjoy your child.”
Raising-Special-kids.com at http://www.raising-special-kids.com/Ten_Commandments_For_Parents.html lists the Ten Commandments for Parents of Children with Disabilities, author unknown. It’s all great advice,
1. Take one day at a time, and take that day positively. You don't have control over the future, but you do have control over today.
2. Never underestimate your child's potential. Allow him, encourage him, expect him to develop to the best of his abilities.
3. Find and allow positive mentors: parents and professionals who can share with you their experience, advice, and support.
4. Provide and be involved with the most appropriate educational and learning environments for your child from infancy on.
5. Keep in mind the feelings and needs of your spouse and your other children. Remind them that this child does not get more of your love just because he gets more of your time.
6. Answer only to your conscience: then you'll be able to answer to your child. You need not justify your actions to your friends or the public.
7. Be honest with your feelings. You can't be a super-parent 24 hours a day. Allow yourself jealousy, anger, pity, frustration, and depression in small amounts whenever necessary.
8. Be kind to yourself. Don't focus continually on what needs to be done. Remember to look at what you have accomplished.
9. Stop and smell the roses. Take advantage of the fact that you have gained a special appreciation for the little miracles in life that others take for granted.
10. Keep and use a sense of humor. Cracking up with laughter can keep you from cracking up from stress.
Everyone is welcome to comment on ways they take it one day at a time!
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